BARFI!

Barfi is a comedy love story of a deaf,  and dumb boy and the two ladies Shruti and autistic Jhilmil. The story is based in Darjeeling and Calcutta.

Barfi falls for Shruti. Its love at first sight for him. He is madly in love with her and so is she. But then Shruti is already engaged and so denies the proposal. Slowly Shruti and Barfi start meeting and fall for each other. Shruti decides to confront everyone and be with Barfi. But then Shruti’s mother tells her, her history.

Shruti’s mother loved a man who cuts forest trees. But then she married Shruti’s Dad, who is well settled in life, educated, with some social status. And now has a well educated young good looking daughter. But the question was that was she in love with Shruti’s Dad?

The answer is no. We, the normal people believe in prioritizing our love life too. We want everything as Shruti’s mother wants. But at a very later stage that marriage is not about money, social status, education or bank balance. Marriage is all about love. And often we overlook this main ingredient- LOVE.

Love is blind and unconditional which is proved in the rest of the love story by witnessing Barfi and Jhilmil’s love story.

Barfi meets Shruti’s parents asking her for marriage. But then, he is heartbroken as he sees her fiance' around.

The reason her mother gives her is he is deaf and dumb. He cannot express his love for her.

Jhilmil Chatterjee comes home to spend the last days with her Nanu. As she is autistic, she lives in Masoom, a home for autistics. Jhilmil’s parents abuse her and are ashamed of her so her Nanu sends her to Masoom where she is the favorite of everyone.

Barfi’s father works as a chauffeur at Jhilmil’s place.

When her Nanu passes away, her family does away with all the servants including Barfi’s father. His father takes to drinking and eventually his kidneys fail and he collapses one night.

Following day, Barfi admits him to the hospital and there the doctors ask him for 7 lakhs of rupees for kidney transplantation.

Barfi at first asks various people for help but no one helps.

He thinks of kidnapping Jhilmil and asking for ransom money. He is successful in kidnapping Jhilmil.

But by the time he collects the money and deposits them, his father leaves for the heavenly abode.

Now Jhilmil has become his liability and so he tries his best to get rid of her. But by that time, Jhilmil had learnt the silent language of love.

Finally Barfi accepts her responsibilities and they start living together in Calcutta. Barfii writes names on utensils in a utensil shop in Calcutta.

He makes her smile, laugh, washes her up, makes meals for her, feeds her. As if he has found a new love in his life, the only reason to be alive.

The point to be noticed here is why is giving and accepting of love for us, the normal people so difficult? Why don’t we give a chance to one another? Why do we spend rest of our lives to chance our partners?

The relationships in which we don’t think from the heart is very difficult to live upto for the rest of our lives.

And the live example of that is Shruti.

 Barfi and Shruti meet once again in Calcutta. She is so happy to see him. Barfi proudly introduces her to Jhilmil. Shruti’s heart sinks but in her heart she is happy that atleast someone is there to love him the way he is.

It is very easy to criticize Shruti but Barfi never does so even though he loves her a lot.

Here is something to learn. Life moves on. Yesterday Shruti was engaged and so she left Barfi. And now Barfi is happy with Jhilmil so he left Shruti.

One night Barfi, Jhilmil and Shruti go out. That day Jhilmil wears a sari for Barfi. And Barfi scolds her in front of Shruti. She is really mad and leaves to return back to Masoom without telling Barfi. Because her mind thinks that Barfi likes Shruti more than her because she is normal and well behaved.

Shruti files a complaint in Calcutta about Jhilmil’s missing out. When her husband comes to know about this he asks her not to return.

Shruti is very excited as she was going to do something that her heart ardently wanted to be with Barfi. But then Barfi is not ready to let go of Jhilmil.

Suddenly it strikes Barfi that Jhilmil might be at Massoom. Barfi’s happiness knows no boundaries when he sees Jhilmil. Even her caretaker was amazed that finally his little girl Jhilmil has found a man who will keep her happy at any cost. Destiny has found her a man who will love her despite of being autistic.

They are happily married and live a simple and a blissfull married life. Away from Jhilmil’s treacherous father who faked her death to get money from the trust which she had inherited from her Nanu.

In their old age, Barfi is seriously ill and Shruti comes to see him. 

And when Jhilmil finally comes to Barfi, she actually shares the death bed with her dying husband. And they die together.

The beauty of this story is that neither Barfi nor Jhilmil had the capacity to change each other. They both spoke a very different physical language but the language of love made them the best couple in the movie. This marriage never complained or compared and loved one another the same way as they used to and both of them were quiet prepared for their own deaths.

No one counseled them, nor did any Astrologer predict their future. But they just loved each other.

There is a saying in Hindi

Pyaar kare to tumse kare,

Tum jaise ho waise kare,

Jo aapko badalkar pyaar karte hain,

Wo pyaar nahi sauda hai,

Aur pyaar suada nahi,

Pyaar pyaar hai.

Love has taken a back seat now. Love has been replaced by lust. During the college days if we don’t have boyfriends or girlfriends then it’s a shame. There is no time for understanding what both the people want. They want to experiment beforehand so they can be confident whether they are compatible with their partners or not. I mean if we are above 25 and are virgins that’s like a taboo in our biodata. It’s the global culture that is affecting us.

Let me tell you this, that the Western World has now realized that lust is not everything. They are willing to marry Indian girls. Being an Indian I would say do not start a relationship, without understanding the future prospectus of it.

A relationship starts with being acquaintances. Then eventually you become friends. Then if that goes on further more both of you start caring for each other, start worrying for each other and make each other happy by starting to visualize a future together and then eventually you become lovers. And then with parents consent you vow to be happily married to each other.

The work done by Ranbir Kapoor, Priyanka Chopra and Ileana D’Cruz is applaudable. Ranbir reminds me of Raj Kapoor. Wish his grandfather was alive to see him groom up in a very responsible young hardworking, talented and witty Kapoor.

Kehte hain ki pyaar kiya nahi jata bas ho jata hai.

This means that Barfi never specified in his life that he just wanted a particular type of girl. Whoever came in hs life, he made the best of it. Barfi knew that he will never be able to marry Shruti because she is married. What he saw was he tried to get rid of Jhimil but she never really left him. She untimely chose death with Barfi.

We have too many conditions that if I am a boy I want a girl who loves me unconditionally, loves and respects my family because I want to be with my family. She should be educated, fair skinned from my caste and the most important our horroscopes should match. She should not have boyfriends and should not have non vegetarian food should be traditional and should not work. She should be younger than me. She should be tall and fair like Miss Universe. She should not work and if she works then all her salary will be mine. If she works then first she has to look after her inlaws, me, and the house. Prepare all the meals by herself lunch and dinner too. But I will sleep with girls after marriage but she should be faithful to me.

Girls are the worst in this case. The boy should be well educated fair and earning loads of money and treats her out. Makes her feel like a queen. He should not cheat her. She wants him to listen to everything make her laugh, console her everything, doesnt ask her to clean the house or make meals. Our horroscopes should match should be from upper caste and should allow me to go to my parents place when I want. I want to stay away from my in laws.

Guys this is love! Both men and women put too many conditions over each other that marriage becomes a compromised alliance not a blissful one.

That is why finding the perfect partner for us normal people becomes so difficult. All we think of love is, that it is not innocent whereas in the initial stages of love it is full of innocence. Slowly slowly the physical intimidation comes and then we all get married to fulfill our wholesome desires may it be physical, mental, emotional, security point of view. to have kids etc.

Barfi is a too out of the world movie. But if we accept whoever comes in our lives like Jhilmil then we should not wait.

All I am saying atlast is for both men and women to start a new life together yes all the social status does matter. But the trust should be the foundation of our love for our partners that come what may I am there for you till my last breath and whatever the situation comes we will face it together. That is the beauty of perfect marriage. We will be faithful to each other. There will be no secrets between us. We will the play the roles of friends, lovers, husband wife, mother, father, brother, sister etc etc.

After all even after marriage no one will remain fully satisfied from mental, physical, emotional, financial. No body in this world can get a perfect life partner. Yet if a girl or a boy thinks that this guy or gal completes their life, or I can be happy with this guy or this gal really makes me feel happy and loved then Voila!

You are in love.

The biggest and the most important thing in love is to have just one expectation to see each other happy and give each other enough space. Never ever talk about you marital relationships outside your bedroom. And most importantly never ever compare.

Yes we do have difference of opinions, and fights that can go on for hours and hours but then collectively just say that both of you love each other and that is all that matters for both of you.

If both of you can appreciate the silent language of love and understand what the opposite person wants just assure them and stick to your words. Well they will test you on and off but be iron willed and strong headed with the softest and the most vulnerable heart.

We have to help each other grow and wait and watch the show unless we get all aces in their hearts. And we win the Poker, pocket them for the rest of our lives and be happy with them.

What do we really want to become succesfull architect, engineers, CAs, artists. Do we want bank balance, a trip to Dubai. Someone calling us on the dias as Masters in Engineering, Gold Medalist. Or a mediocre student making 30k a month working as a teacher and has the best married life ever and the whole world is jealous of them?

Despite all their difference of opinions, they are so perfect for each other and always make each other feel happy great and loved.

In this life everything is predesigned by God. But to have a state of happiness or saddness is upto us and we have to make the love endure all the tests of time.

Thats all what is Barfi all about!!!! Ala ala re matvala Barfi! Paav pada re mota chhala Barfi!